I know where I'm going to die. It will be in my own home.
I know who will do it. He lives next door and drives his Nan's Ford to church twice a week.
I know how he'll kill me. He's been practising his knots and sharpening the kitchen knives too.
I just don't know when he'll do it.
That's the worst part of this, of knowing every other detail right up to the way his upper lip twitches when he finds he can't lift me onto the chair so he can kick it out from under my feet. It's not that I want to die, I just want to know when so I can get my life in order enough that it'll be easier on everyone instead of leaving them with debts and no last will and testament.
Even if I do prepare all of this it'll just mean that I'll be waiting with nothing else to do but watch him until he makes the final move. Sure I could move and avoid this whole thing but I know this would just happen in whatever new place I go to with whatever new neighbour I have, no matter how many miles it is between my house and theirs.
I've been through this with several homes before, you see. From single house in the countryside to high security apartment in the middle of a city. Every time I have the dreams showing me how I'll die and by whom. It's always the same method and always a neighbour.
Out of all the neighbours I've had, this one I don't mind killing me. It'd be enough to get him off the streets where he's done worse than plain murder. I just need to know when before I take matters into my own hands, invite him over and ask him to just end me already.
Maybe that's what I need to do though.
I know who will do it. He lives next door and drives his Nan's Ford to church twice a week.
I know how he'll kill me. He's been practising his knots and sharpening the kitchen knives too.
I just don't know when he'll do it.
That's the worst part of this, of knowing every other detail right up to the way his upper lip twitches when he finds he can't lift me onto the chair so he can kick it out from under my feet. It's not that I want to die, I just want to know when so I can get my life in order enough that it'll be easier on everyone instead of leaving them with debts and no last will and testament.
Even if I do prepare all of this it'll just mean that I'll be waiting with nothing else to do but watch him until he makes the final move. Sure I could move and avoid this whole thing but I know this would just happen in whatever new place I go to with whatever new neighbour I have, no matter how many miles it is between my house and theirs.
I've been through this with several homes before, you see. From single house in the countryside to high security apartment in the middle of a city. Every time I have the dreams showing me how I'll die and by whom. It's always the same method and always a neighbour.
Out of all the neighbours I've had, this one I don't mind killing me. It'd be enough to get him off the streets where he's done worse than plain murder. I just need to know when before I take matters into my own hands, invite him over and ask him to just end me already.
Maybe that's what I need to do though.
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