I don't get out much, mostly just sit down roughly in the middle of where all my bones are now that current and river critters have broken my body down. Sometimes I'll drift to the surface to see if he's come back, see if the guilt's driven him to return but in four years I've not seen him once.
I see my mum though, she walks the dogs along here every now and then. They see me but she can't seem to figure out why they're so desperate to play in the river. Last week they showed me that I can't touch the living - my hands went straight through them but I could hold onto their collars.
It made me wonder if I'd be able to move my bones to the shore. I'd have to find them all and move them to one central place cause if someone goes diving for my bones and misses one I could be torn between wherever they bury me and the river.
Took all night but I found all of myself and make sure none of me would be washed any further away. All I've got to do now is move myself to the shore and wait for someone to find me. For the first time in four years I hope my dad doesn't visit me.
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